Hell yeah, I am.

They were not kidding when they say money can take down a marriage. It was not the thing that imploded mine but it was certainly a contributing factor. For years. And I mean years. Like, I was just pregnant with Bogen years.

This inability to discuss money resulted in some weird, and patently untrue, thoughts about my ability to make, manage, save and spend money. I was a girl who would balance my checkbook to the penny and if I was in the red, I was literally in the red. You lot know how I love all my many colored markers. But all of a sudden my narrative was that I was shit with money and couldn't handle it well at all and my life was always going to be paycheck to paycheck. Not true.

I started reading money books last year and once I became the Head of Household, I picked them up and reread again in earnest. I am listening to Jen Sincero's "You Are a Badass at Making Money: Master the Mindset of Wealth" and today she told me I am an emmer effing badass. Umm, hell yeah I am.

I have read both of her books and find them to be relatable, inspiring and motivating. It's not that I had forgotten how to manage money or that I was a badass. It's that I softened those parts to make things easier. More palatable. More harmonious. Ooops. I didn't know how little that actually helps. I also didn't really see it happening. The way you don't know you've gained just too many pounds until you're in the fat lady section because you need a much larger pair of pants. Preferably with an elastic waist band. That was then. This is now. And, yeah, I am an emmer effing bad(k)ass. Thanks for noticing. And you know what? I bet you are, too.

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